Today was the first day of the official homecare. The worker you had today was very nice, but her hands were somewhat tied. She wasn’t able to do much with you. It’s no fault of hers or yours. It’s the system. Until a bath assessment can be done, she can’t get you showered. Until the PT and OT train her and her colleagues they are not allowed to perform any therapies. The homecare worker has to be creative to find things to do with you that are helpful.
In the afternoon, you visit Donald. His 90th birthday will be in July. He is tired and seems a little confused. You are saddened by this. I understand how you feel. It’s hard seeing a good friend shrink away from living.
As we leave you stop to talk to another resident. He is your age and has been in the long-term care facility for many years. He has seen a lot of people fade away over the years. He has known Donald for some time and has seen a difference too.
Some wise words come from you as the two of you talk. “What happens to you is up to you.” A long-term care facility would disable you further. I can’t image visiting you in this place with the children. I found it hard to visit my father as an adult, I can’t image what it would be like for children to visit their father in a nursing home like this.
There are moments that you think this is where you should be. No! I scream in my head. I couldn’t bare that. You have to be home with us. As long as it’s possible, I will do anything to have you home and give our children a shot at a normal family life.
I will no let you give up.