Monday, April 19, 2010

Thursday April 15 – Timing is Everything

After music practice with Chella, Tara asks me why I look tired. I was called twice in the night with animal emergencies. I am tired today. I look tired and I feel tired. I told her that I needed some sleep to allow me to continue this pace.

She noted a similarity with what she and Chella were just talking about. Breathe control. “I see, timing is everything.” She said knowingly, “Sleep must be well timed, just like a breath when you sing. Good well-timed breaths make song beautiful. Well-timed sleep makes your day go better.”

How do kids figure this stuff out? It took me years to know that and I could never have said it so poetically.
Tonight you expressed a need to reinvent yourself. You feel that you are born again in many ways. As a result, you want to give away some of your ‘old left over you’. Since you didn’t get to give away your organs, you want to give away materialistic things. Things that you felt defined you before your stroke. The cross, the golden 29 and the Notre Dame ring were all part of you but now you want to share with people who you have grown to love and respect.

You found a good home for the cross and the golden 29 that lived on your chain during your recovery. Now you want to give your ring away. You had designed and had this ring made. It has engraved on the inside your favorite line from the ‘If’ poem. ‘If you can fill the unforgiving minute with sixty seconds' worth of distance run…’ This ring has a lot of meaning to you and you want it to go to a special person … your OT (the new-old one).

You are doubtful that she will accept it. She operates on a very professional level and doesn’t want to confuse your thinking process by letting you get close. I understand this and so do you rationally with your left brain but your damaged right brain wants to give her something of the ‘old you’.

You wanted to know what I thought. I said that you should do what you think is right but I wanted you to understand that she may not accept it. You accepted my advise and you ‘wisely’ decided to keep the our wedding ring which you now put on your right ring finger and the St Christopher medal that I gave you many years ago. I guess your right brain isn’t that badly damaged.

I ask about the battle of smoking. No smoke yet – but the urge is there. “Maybe this weekend.” You say … I’m onto you now. I think you say that so I will pay attention to you. That’s OK – bring it on, I’m ready. As Tara said “timing is everything.”

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